Project Single Mom’s National Advocacy Week

“I AM THE FACE OF POVERTY”

Project Single Moms Worldwide is holding their first National Advocacy Week the week of May 7-11, 2012.  First let me introduce you to the most needed 501(c)3 in the nation, actually worldwide.  Project Single Moms Worldwide, Inc.  is a volunteer-led national advocacy and empowerment movement designed to empower and engaged single mothers in the area of education, employment and entrepreneurship thus helping them to achieve economic self-sufficiency as well as financial security for their families. The movement strives to organize and create a unified voice for single mothers in America.  Membership is free and open to single mothers from all socioeconomic an ethnic backgrounds.  Single Moms what are you waiting for.. get involved.

                Are You the Face of Poverty?

Project Single Moms Worldwide is bringing attention to the “I AM THE FACE Of POVERTY” campaign in order to bring attention to the issue of more than one in five U.S. children living in poverty as well as more than two in five reside in low income single mother heads of household.  Crazy when you think about it. What’s even crazier is how attention is not being brought to this fact more often.  Are you apart of these numbers?

                The Face of Poverty looks like me!

The facts show that the Face of Poverty looks like 80% of African American and Hispanic children whom are living in poverty in America.  Project Single Moms Worldwide is using this Advocacy week to spread the word about the importance of educating your legislators about the plight of single moms and their children in America.  Project Single Moms Worldwide Inc wants to communicate the importance of the Project Single Moms movement in helping move single mothers and their children from poverty and low-income status toward economic self-sufficiency.

                You Are the Face of Poverty!

Take a moment and think about the face of poverty.  Leave a comment and let us know exactly what you think about these staggering numbers.  Share this blog post with your friends.  We are looking to mobilize single moms.  If you are a successful single mom, well then pay it forward and join the movement.  We owe it ourselves, we owe it to our children, we owe it because you never know when you may have to stand and say,

I AM THE FACE OF POVERTY!

Wisconsin’s Senate Bill 507 is CRAZY!

Wow, I know I haven’t posted in a while. I have spent the first quarter of this year purging my house.. or some may call it spring cleaning. I read some news today that literally forced me to come back to the blog and take action! First I should let you know that I have missed you.. smile.

Now let me discuss this crazy Wisconsin Senate Bill 507.  Let me start by letting you know that it is an amendment requiring the Child Abuse and Neglect Prevention Board to emphasize non-marital parenthood as a contributing factor to child abuse and neglect.  Yes you read it correctly. This amendment is introduced by Senator Glenn Grothman, a Republican.

I’ve decided to start by allowing you to

Listen to Senator Glenn Grothman’s speak on Senate Bill 507

  Let me tell you some major facts about this man.  He has never been married and has NO children.  Let me repeat no children.

Ok.. this guy basically just stated that Single Moms should consider adoption to avoid raising children out of wedlock.  So we do not care about our children as Single Moms.  He states that there is a direct connection between Single parent house holds and child abuse and neglect.  CRAZY!!

Wisconsin Senate Bill 507 is moving through quickly.. Pay Attention!

Senator Glenn Grothman stated in another interview that fathers are the PRIMARY preventor of child abuse and neglect, when they are in the home, basically blaming Single Mom’s for this child abuse and neglect. As you watch the video.. notice that this man believes that Single Parent homes are BROKEN HOMES!! He says it repeatedly. It is completely insulting.  My girls do not feel like they are raised in a broken home, and I’m pretty sure that the Single Moms in Wisconsin may feel the same way.  I mean lets look at the facts.. 1/3 of the Moms in Wisconsin are Single Moms.  Wisconsin Senate Bill 507 is insulting and attacks Single Moms.

Many others spoke against this Senate Bill 507… Praise God! Yet I believe that we should observe this situation as Single Moms. Don’t sleep and let this pass you buy.  This Republican Senator Glenn is making some wild accusations in reference to Single Parent homes, in other interviews he has put majority of the Single parent home “issue” on the Moms.. stating that it is “our decision” to bring children into the world outside of wedlock.

Moms, we need to pay attention and unite.  There are reasons why some choose to attack those that they ‘THINK” are weak.  Well, I ‘m here to state that when Senator Glenn Grothman decided to attack Single Moms by directly relating us to child abuse and neglect, he made a POOR decision, because we are far from weak.  In fact I would step out and say that we are some of the STRONGEST women on the planet.

I’m here to simply let you know the information.  You can make your own decisions and complete your research.. yet do not sit there and think that if  Wisconsin Senate Bill 507 passes in Wisconsin that Republicans will not try to pass a bill of this nature in other states.. maybe even your state.  This bill effects all of us as Single Moms.

You can HELP!!! Project Single Moms, Worldwide Inc. is sending an open letter to Senator Glenn Grothman to let him know that we are paying attention,and that he is WAY off base.  Make YOUR VOICE HEARD TODAY!!! CLICK HERE!

Do Not let Wisconsin Senate Bill 507 get through..Let’s keep our eyes open. Senate Bill 507 must not PASS!

I’m not really sure where to start with this topic

Inconsistent Non-Custodial Parents!

As you already know.. I plan to be as honest with you as possible on this blog.  Seriously being a single mom is a blessing, I don’t care how you spin it. Now before I really get into this topic let me throw the disclaimer out.. I am a single mom and I’m writing this post from that perspective.  If you are a single father, I’m sure you may deal with this issue as well, yet I’m writing this from MY perspective.. Rock on.. smile.

I’m writing this post for single moms as well as Non-custodial dads to get some insight.  Yesterday, my oldest child’s father called her,and I gave her the phone after I informed the father that he didn’t need to discuss anything deep because she had school the next day.  Why did I mention this to him you ask.  Well he had only spoken to her twice in five weeks.  Oh and let me add during  those five weeks we had Christmas and New Years, where he did not call, and the first time he called he tells my daughter some devastating news, that an eleven year old didn’t need to hear from a father she hadn’t heard from consistently.

So I give my daughter the phone and start washing dishes, I turn around and my beautiful child is boo hoo crying.. I mean shoulders jumping up and down and everything.  I go over to her and she stands up and I hug her, while she is still talking to her father.  The phone disconnects, he was on the train or something.. and I ask my daughter what is wrong.  She says, “He didn’t say anything, I just really miss him, and I want to see him”. I held her and let her know that I understand.

I really do not like to see my daughter cry over things that are avoidable.  My daughter has not seen her father in…..I don’t even know.. Maybe two times last year.  Yes you read it right.  See he lost his license for not paying child support and basically has my daughter thinking the child support is the reason he can’t get to her.  I call it excuses.. personally especially considering that he lives about 20 min away, which is close in our neck of the woods.

I have made it very clear that rather he pays the money or not, he needs to be consistent with visiting his daughter.  I say to all Fathers out there and single mom’s listen too.   There is something that comes from a father, that a mother can not give.  There is a confidence that a little girl gains from knowing she is loved by her father.  There is a strength that boys gain from knowing they are loved by their fathers.  Any father that allows anything to keep them from their child should ask  WHY?  Truthfully there is NO EXCUSE! NO REASON that is going to make up for the fact that you did not do your job instilling the items into your child that can only come from you.

As I held my daughter crying because she misses her father, whom I have my own opinions about, all I could do was be there for her with love, and understanding. This moment was not the time for me to call her father names and talk about what he should have done.  I had to let her know that her father loves her and that he is doing the best HE believes he can do. I had to let her know that it is okay to cry about the situation and that she should continue to cry as many times as she needs to.

See Moms, I felt a Peace about the situation….

How?? You may ask.. That is simple, what a blessing to be able to hold my daughter as she cries.  What a blessing that she wants to come and let me hold her while she goes through this season of hurt and lack of understanding.  See Moms, if you keep a positive tongue concerning your children’s fathers.. rather they do their job or not.. you children will love you for that.  You will reap what you sow. I personally want to reap love.  I want my daughter to know that just because it hurts doesn’t mean it isn’t love.

Stay with me for a second… When Jesus was on the cross and he called out to his Father, My God, My God, why have you forsaken me? (Matthew 27:45 NIV). God still loved Jesus, He simply couldn’t look at him as he held all of our sin.  I consider it an honor that God trust me to love my daughter through this hard time.  I keep the focus on what is true.. My daughter is going through this now so that I have the opportunity to show her who God is and what his plans are for her.

As she cried, I explained that I knew how she felt, see my parents divorced when I was 13 years old, yet they separated when I was 9.  The main difference is that my father paid child support, yet he lived in America while I lived in Germany.  I told her I know the hurt, and the lack of understanding.  So I reminded her that EVERYTHING God brings us through is for GOOD.  It will end good, and this is not the end.  This moment is just that .. a moment.

There needs to come a time when we push past our selves and love our kids FIRST. Yes, I was frustrated, no I didn’t like seeing my baby hurt.  Yet I would rather her hurt in my arms then out there in this world we live in.  Make a decision moms, our kids will hurt, it’s life.  There is nothing we can do to change that fact.  What we can control is how we teach them to deal with hurt.

I know this post was long.. yet I had to share it with you guys.. see there is a mom out there that needed reminding.  We are strong, we are loved, we are irreplaceable, we are MOMS!!

Love Ya,

I have a treat for my Single Moms!

As Single Moms, some of us spend most of our time working, carrying the kids to their extra-curricular activities, cooking, cleaning, going to Church… basically taking care of everything.

Now some of my Single Moms out there are like myself, and do not date due to the fact that it is not guaranteed.  See I am personally raising two daughters.  My daughters are going to learn exactly how to act toward men by watching me.  No ifs, ands, or buts about it! They are going to learn how to deal with men, based on what I SHOW them.  It has nothing to do with what I say and everything to do with what I do. 

Truthfully, I would love for more single moms to take this stand.  Now just because I do not date, or entertain men, does not mean that I do not want to become a wife someday.  I simply want to make sure that the “HOW” I become a wife is something that I would love to see my daughters venture into.  I simply do not want them to end up giving themselves away over and over and over again to men who do not deserve them.  As single moms I’m sure you understand. I mean look at your own experiences and then close your eyes and see your child participating in the same activities.

I do surround myself with God fearing, trustworthy men.  I can honestly say the men in my life are great friends and most are family…lol. One of them has an awesome internet radio show every Tuesday at 8PM EST.  His name is Mr. Kenny Pugh.  Some day I will have an interview with him so that you can get the inside scoop on this man of God.  Now last night the show was titled “Do Men Still Desire Relationships”!  See I surround myself with men that are not afraid to tell me the truth.  Men that respect me and the fact that I’m a mother of two amazing daughters.  Ladies, I’ve said it before and I will say it again.. your children will do what you do rather they see you do it or not.  Yet this whole “SINGLE” thing sometimes leaves us out of the loop of what really makes a man want to take things to the next level.  Well, Mr. Kenny Pugh is kind of enough to have a show that literally takes us into the “Man Cave” and allows us to get into the minds of God fearing men to see exactly what they desire.  Take a moment and watch the replay of the show below.

Single Moms order your copy of “Can You Do It Standing Up? Today Click Below!

I just saw Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol today.. and is it just me.. or..

Do you feel like driving fast after leaving a movie of this nature.. I mean seriously.. maybe it is just me.. considering that I learned how to drive in Frankfurt Germany. Yes I drove on the Autobahn at the age of 17.. and ever since I have had this need for speed. Yes, my license has been on rocking ground here in America before.. smiling. I left the movie today driving faster than usual. Then I saw a cop, and slowed my tail down. Just to give you a visual I drive a VW Jetta. It is actually my fifth Volkswagon. I drove my VW like I was driving this…

Yes! The BMW i8 from Mission Impossible 4

Just watching this car on the big screen was AMAZING.. (I mean I lived in Frankfurt Germany for 13 years.. German Engineering is in my blood.. lol..) I left the theater ready to push the pedal to the metal. Don’t worry, my kids were not in the car. This desire brought a serious revelation to my mind. I sat in a movie theater for 2 hours and once I left I had a desire to drive a fast car… FAST!! Well the same desire comes from filling your mind for 2 hours with motivating information. It is said that multi-millionaires read for at minimum of 30 minutes a day. Many tell you that by reading they make their mission impossible situations conquerable. How much are reading? I’m currently reading 3 books, and these books help keep me motivated and fired up to keep pushing forward toward my goals. Now I don’t know about you.. yet I have found that sometimes it is kind of hard to keep pushing through each failure and to keep pushing after each success. I mean sometimes it seems like a complete

Mission Impossible!

Well, we are on the brink of a new year. Look back at your library pick up a book that maybe you did not finish. Pick up a new book and start it today. I mentioned that I’m currently reading three books. I’m reading Web Copy That Sells and The New Community Rules: Marketing on the Social Web and my current motivational book is The Complete Works of E.M. Bounds on Prayer. Each of these books help to take me to the next level in my business and I always include a book that takes me that next level in my life! If you are new to being in business for yourself, or if you work for somebody else and you are looking for a mindset book, check out The Greatest Secret in The World.

Just like that Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol made me leave wanting to drive a fast car, or my car faster.. lol. Reading a book that motivates you to try the newest techniques or improve your current techniques will leave you wanting to take that next step to success.. 2011 is just about gone. Review what you have accomplished and what you still have left to accomplish. What can you do different in 2012 to reach your goals that are left? If you are not reading daily, or looking at motivational, uplifting, educational information daily then add it to your daily activity list of 2012 and watch how much more you accomplish. Make your Mission Impossible the Mission Accomplished!

Do You Have Faith??

The above question was the only place I could see to start off this post.  I have had to look to my faith over and over again over the last couple of months.  Let’s start by looking at the definitions of faith.  In the Wikipedia it states that Faith is confidence or trust in a person or thing, or a belief that is not based on proof. The Merriam-Webster dictionary states that Faith is allegiance to duty or a person : loyalty and a  firm belief in something for which there is no proof : complete trust.  Ok, now that we know exactly what it means to have faith, we can take an honest review of our lives and see if we are using faith at all.

As I read through the definitions, I realized that having faith was one of the hardest lessons I had to learn.  See in my past I always believed in what I could see, touch, feel.  Well, most of the time, I missed out on many great opportunities all because I was not willing to take  a risk past what I could actually see in front of me.  Now if you know me, I’m near sited and have worn glasses since the fifth grade. So basically I can’t see too far in front.. smiling. Yet, when faith became an issue I simply did not understand.

It seems Faith became easier as I aged.

Over the years I have matured.  I understand that I can not control everything. I don’t know if you have noticed in your life, yet the older I get the less I know. Funny how that happens.  The more I realize I do not know as much as I thought the more faith I have.  My faith has grown, my trust has grown, my belief has grown.  Rarely have things turned out the way I thought they would in my life.  My accomplishments continue to amaze me and my disappointments continue to leave me wondering how I didn’t see them coming.

My faith is strong, yet as I’m writing this article , I realize that I am in the process of being stretched further than I have ever been stretched before.  The relationships I thought I understood, I’m finding out they are not what I thought. The direction I thought my business was going, I’m finding out it is going in another direction.  The experiences I’m supposed to share are the ones I thought were supposed to remain secret. I mean it is all really uncomfortable, yet as I’m writing these words,

I stand on my faith!

The belief in what I’ve accomplished.  The belief in the love that surrounds me.  The trust in the promises made to me. The joy that settles in my spirit each and every day that I move in a state of faith. Every single time I get in my own way I can tell I’m doing it.  You can probably tell the same in your life as well.  Let me just get totally honest with you, the fact that I’m even writing this article is stretching.  The only way I can continue to allow the stretching is by focusing on the beliefs and trust that I listed earlier.  See we have to know who we are, in order to move in faith.  In business they call it risk.. yet I call it faith in business as well.  The only reason I’m a successful self-employed single mother today is because of my faith.

There were times in my life when I ignored my lack of faith.  My choice led me in the opposite direction of the one I wanted to go in.  I’m guessing that somebody reading this article, maybe even YOU, is feeling like they have no room for faith in their life. Or better yet, that having faith has always let you down.  If you look back on your faith experiences and all you see is disappointment, then I recommend you look deeper.  Why? Well, I use to walk in the state of “Woo Me” when it came to my faith.  It looked like disappointment after disappointment. Yet then I looked again.. and I realized I missed the TRUTH.  Here is example, see I’m a single mom, yet I would love to have a husband.  So I saw the faith in getting a husband as a disappointment.  Let me tell you, I had to look at the truth of that thing.  See, my not having a husband has nothing to do with my faith.. it has to do with my LACK OF FAITH.  See I made bad decisions because I did not trust, believe, or have faith.  Once I was able to look at the truth in that situation, I begin to look at many of my past disappointments that I was blaming on faith. Like my business, my family relationships, and my friendships. I can honestly tell you that every disappointment was due to lack of faith.  Once I started moving forward with faith everything changed.

Faith brings forth success, hopes, and dreams.

Where are you placing your faith? Do you have faith? Do you need help with your faith? I have answers for each question, and they weren’t always positive. Yet, you must start someplace, so I recommend you start with the truth about your faith.

Have You Ever Been Told To “Give It Back”??

Lately, in my life.. I have heard these three words over and over again! I decided to share some of my thoughts about having to always “Give It Back”! Now as usual, you may agree with me, you may not.. yet these are my experiences.. Now.. It all starts when you decide that something is yours…what is that something?? Well, remember I’m coming from the perspective of a Single Mom.  That something can be a man, a house, a ministry, a dress, a car, a friendship, a relationship, a business idea, a business, or even your children… Yep.. I said it YOUR CHILDREN! I’ve grown over the years and most of the time it was painful.  It was painful because I refused to give up what I felt belonged to me.  I know one of the most painful situations was letting go of a friendship.  I knew this “friend” since we were 14.  We grew up together, you see I felt this “friend” knew me inside and out, and truth be told he did.  Yet, as I grew and changed and matured, he kept seeing me as the  person I was in my past. He didn’t grow with me.  I was told to “Give It Back”.. Let me tell you, I was told this in 2001.  It took me 10 years to finally let go.  Now looking back, I sincerely wish I gave it back when I was first told too.  See it turned out, that he wasn’t the “friend” I thought he was… and he didn’t even realize it.. Life is funny like that some times.You may wonder, why keep the friendship if it wasn’t good for you.. well, see when I was letting go in 2006, my brother died, and I felt like the only “guy” that really had my back was gone.. so I held on to my “friend”.

Read Rest Of Entry

Tell Me To Be Patient and find out.. lol..

Have you ever felt like every time you turn around somebody is telling you to be patient.  I mean to be honest with you I can’t stand to hear that.. to the point that I have friends that try to sugar coat words to me.. as if I don’t know that they are actually saying to be patient.  Well, I’m just going to have to continue to stay transparent with you, patience is not my strong suit.  Yet, it is not impossible for me to be patient.  I just do not like it very much.  Let’s be real, we live in a world of immediate satisfaction.  I would even go out on a limb and say the babies born in the 70′s are the last generation to exhibit some sort of understanding of delayed gratification.. and it is hard for us..  I mean compared to the generations born in the 1940′s and 1950′s.

To Be Patient is not always a bad thing.. or is it..

LOL.. no seriously that statement above made me literally laugh out loud.  You see the funny thing is that every single time that I’ve been patient I can honestly say I received the BEST outcome.  EVERY TIME!!  Yet, I can not name one time when it FELT good.. which really is the point.  It stretches you to that place that pulls you outside of your comfort zone.  To be patient is to make a decision that I’m willing to wait for the BEST instead of the OK.  To be patient is to say that I’m stronger then you think I am… AHHHHHH you  like that one right..  I like to compare patience to silent power!

To Be Patient = To Be Strong

Guard Your Heart.. FIRST!!

What do I mean by Guard Your Heart?? I understand why you may ask this question.. It’s one of those statements that people say like everyone knows what it means.. lol.. I don’t know if you understand where I’m coming from.. yet let me continue.. When I became a mom.. a love came over me that I had never felt before.  I can’t explain it to you.. just like I can’t explain how it feels to give birth.. yet I will tell you it brought me to a place of tenderness, a place of softness.  See I rarely showed a sensitive side.. it simply was not my style prior to becoming a mom.  Yet motherhood changed all that.. smile.  I began to wear my heart on my sleeve.. anybody could touch it.. anybody could take advantage of it.  Now you are probably thinking.. why did you let that happen.  Well.. I didn’t LET anything happen. I didn’t realize that I was not guarding my heart.

             Ladies, Guard Your Heart!

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Have you made Decisions with a Broken Heart??

Well, I have… many many times.  As I look back, my first thought was WHY would I make such decisions when I was not complete and with a broken heart.  What kind of decisions you may ask?? Well, you name it.  Let’s see where to start.  I can remember being 9 years old and my parents sitting me down to tell me they were getting a divorce… we are at Broken Heart number 1.. at least from what I remember.. Yet my heart was broken because I remember my mom acting all upset.. and my dad getting up and leaving without saying good bye to me.  I thought he was angry with me.. I was DEVASTATED.  Now from this point I simply made bad decision after bad decision.  Not really understanding.. due to the fact that I was young.

Broken Heart Decisions have consequences..

Every decision I ever made with a broken heart has lead to disaster.  I mean when you think about it.. how can something positive come out of decision made when broken.. I can relate to a cake made with eggs.. yet the chef accidentally dropped egg shells in the batter.. and didn’t take them out.. It wasn’t intentional.. yet at the end of the baking process the egg shells cause a crunch that is unexpected.. and really unwanted.. I’m simply going to be honest with you.. I have made cakes with egg shells.. sometimes I knew the shells were in the batter and simply didn’t give a ….. crap.. lol.. and other times I was so blinded by my pain that I didn’t even see the egg shells go in to the batter.

There’s healing for a Broken Heart!

As single mom’s we have to pay close attention to the state of our hearts.  Ladies we must remember that our babies are watching our every move.. and I always say, “that my daughters will DO WHAT I DO, RATHER THEY SEE ME OR NOT!! It’s simply in the blood!!!” We have to live our lives in TRUTH.. not delusion.  We are raising the next generation.  If you are a single mom raising sons.. there is a chance you could be raising my daughters husband.. I’m just saying.. smiling. I’m not speaking to you from on top of a horse.. I’m right here in the trenches with you.  My oldest enjoys me much more today then she did 4 years ago.  I simply was living in a state of a broken heart, making poor decisions, and looking at yesterday instead of the right now.  I was missing so much as life passed me by.  It was like my broken heart determined what I acknowledged. I know some of you reading this post.. know exactly what I’m talking about.  I don’t even have to go into detail about each bad decision.. You already know..

I always say knowing is half the battle.. I’m hoping that reading this post will allow you to evaluate the state of your heart.  See sometimes our hearts are broken.. yet life is so busy.. we do not take the time to acknowledge it.. other times we can’t ignore the fact that our heart is broken.  Today I challenge you to review the state of your heart.  How does your heart look?? Is it a whole complete heart? Or is it a broken heart? If you believe you have a broken heart then fill out the form below and let’s get back to smiling.